Hello and welcome to the tenth episode of the powerful questions podcast. My name is David Shaked. This episode marks an important milestone for me being the tenth in the series.
It all started with having a dream I had only a few months ago about a podcast that would make a positive difference to the people who listen to it. So, now, seems like a great time to ignite some inspiration in you, as we explore the question of “What is your dream?”
Firstly, let’s check - Do you actually have dreams?
By that I mean not the kind of dreams you have at night and therefore don’t really control or shape and influence. I’m not even talking about day-dreaming or phantasies. I’m talking about dreams about your life – personal or professional, or both… Visions of a desired future for yourself, for the significant people in your life or for your team, business or organisation. Maybe you have wishes or hopes about what you want to see or experience in the future? Some of you might even have inspiring ideas about the types of communities you want to form or be part of.
Do you give yourself permission to dream? Do you value your dreams? Are they significant for you?
In our childhood, early teens or even in early stages of adulthood, it is so much easier to dream… but perhaps at some point in the past, you were told or learnt that you should “be realistic” and focus on what is in front of you. Some of you might even find the word ‘DREAM’ a little unconventional or you might feel a bit uneasy with it, but even if I ask you what you hope for or what your wishes are, you’d probably struggle to express those too.
From time to time, we might catch ourselves dreaming about our future or expressing a wish or longing for something beyond what is currently going on in our lives. But we quickly dismiss that and focus again on getting on with our lives, work or commitments.
Why do I emphasise the value of exploring your dreams?
Dreams are important for many reasons – I would even say they are essential to our lives. Dreams have a role which is to propel and lift us beyond what we believe is possible, achievable or accessible to us in the present. Once we are clear on our dreams, they can provide a “direction of travel” or a “true north” to aim for and they guide us through key decision points. Dreams also inspire and give us hope or energy, even in tough times or when facing challenges related to those dreams. They help us find opportunities that are more suitable for us and they can engage others who might, in response to listening to these dreams, offer their help.
From Appreciative Inquiry, I learnt about the anticipatory principle. It says that people, groups, organisations or communities propel themselves into action based on their dreams. In other words, being clear about our dreams, hopes, aspirations, visions or longings, significantly raises the chance of achieving them. Of course, having a dream doesn’t guarantee you will realise it exactly as you envisioned it but it certainly gives a sense of direction, purpose and energy to pursue it. Sharing your dreams with others can also help by opening unexpected paths to fulfilling those dreams. That allows the person you are sharing your dreams with to get to know you better and to understand what drives you.
So many of us don’t regularly take time to reflect on or to clarify our dreams. Even if you have general high-level dreams, have you considered adding more details and colour to the “picture” of that dream? For example, maybe at some point you had a wish to “be more successful”, to “start your own business”, to “buy a house” or “to change the world”? These are, of course, very aspirational wishes but they are so broad that they risk becoming meaningless, almost like dreaming about winning the lottery without buying a ticket. It would really help if you could be a lot more specific with your dreams. What kind of success are you longing for? What kind of house would you love to live in? What change do you want to create in the world around you?
By the way, while I mostly refer to the word ‘dream’ in this episode, I occasionally use alternative words such as hopes, aspirations, visions or longings. There are some subtle differences between these words but for the purpose of the overall “What’s your dream?” question, the differences are not significant, so feel free to use the alternative words if they feel easier or more relevant to your context. For example, I might ask an individual what are their hopes or longings, while asking a work team about their vision for the future of their work, or the project they are working on. If I work with a larger department or an organisation, I actually prefer to use the word dream because it is fairly unusual in those contexts, while the word ‘vision’ seems to me to be overused and less inspiring. The choice of the best word to use is up to you!
Your dreams should express something that is wanted by you and that you would like to move towards or realise. Watch out for ‘horror dreams’ – creating or expressing scenarios of what you deeply wish to avoid or run away from. You are likely to manifest and bring to life whatever your dreams are focused on whether desired or undesired situations. So rather than saying “I hope this project won’t fail and drag us downwards with it” think about what your alternative, more inspiring, hope is for this project.
So, what are your deepest wishes for yourself this year professionally or personally, or both? Are they interlinked? What about the next few years?
What do you truly hope to be able to create,
become,
get involved with
or experience?
Now how about adding some more detail…
What does your dream scenario look like?
Feel like?
Sound like?
Or even smell and taste like?
What parts of this dream truly inspire and energise you? How so?
What popped into your mind as I asked these questions?
Did certain words or images flash by quickly in your mind?
Did an inspiring story start to form in your head?
Try to capture these elements in a journal and explore further. Can you add more words or elements to clarify what they mean for you? Your dream can be expressed as a story you create, an image you have in mind or even in other creative ways, maybe through an object, a drawing or a metaphor. Having a title or a short phrase that captures your dream’s essence and its significance for you could also be very helpful.
Another thing to remember is, that our dreams are far more likely to be achieved if they are grounded in, or linked to, our past successes, our resources, strengths, knowledge or even in the current possibilities around us. This is the reason why I introduced many other powerful questions before I covered this one. If you used some of the powerful questions I have already introduced in previous episodes with yourself or with others, you will have a very rich “soil” to grow your dream out of – a combination of stories about your high moments in the past, what gives you joy, what’s possible or available, your current knowledge, skills, abilities and resources etcetera.
The more the discoveries from those questions inform your dreams, the better! This is because those dreams will be based on what you have already experienced, what you know, and what you can access. Your dreams will always be more realisable when they are rooted in an existing reality from the past or the present. Of course, your dreams for the future will amplify what you already have or what you’ve achieved in the past even further, but starting from something that already exists ensures that there is always a strong positive core of real strengths at the heart.
And even after you crafted a dream that inspires you, it would be helpful to refer back to some of the powerful questions I already introduced such as “what’s available?” or “what’s possible?” and connect those questions to your dream as a way to pursue it.
For example, as you read, look at, or reflect on your dream, you can ask yourself: “What is readily available to me that could help me start realising this dream?” or “What is possible for me, at the present moment, that could help me move in the direction of my dream?”
Another powerful aspect of the “What’s your dream?” question can be experienced when we apply it to a group, an organisation or even a larger community and ask “What is OUR dream for this team? This organisation? Our community?”
When a dream is shared by someone else or even by many people, it can be pursued jointly and create a big change. It will also activate, build on and utilise the resources and strengths of all the people involved in creating that dream, not just the strengths of a single person, however talented they might be. Pay attention, though, when dreaming with others that the dream you come up with is not driven or influenced by the dream of one, however significant, member of the group – for example, the leader of that group, the most talkative person in the room, the CEO of a company or anyone else with a position of power or influence. In that case the dream is not truly shared by everyone and will not have the same energy as a vision that is.
Another tip I can offer you when dreaming with others is to pay attention to what inspires, energises or excites you about someone else’s dream and build on it further.
Let’s say you are trying to co-create a shared vision for a team you are a member of, or for an organisation. It is possible that you might not yet have a clear idea for a specific dream for that team. In that case, pay special attention when listening to others describe their hopes for the team or organisation and seek out the elements or ideas that inspire you too. If you feel inspired by something someone else expressed as their wish for the team, it will help in bringing your own ideas to the mix. Also, so many of us tend to focus on the elements we don’t like in someone else’s ideas. It risks “throwing the baby out with the bathwater” – by rejecting or pushing back on certain aspects of someone else’s inspiring ideas, we risk disengaging them and losing their energy to contribute to the shared dream. It would be far more productive to pay attention to what you like in those dreams and to try to build or stretch it further with your ideas. It can lead to a very engaging, inspiring and productive conversation. The people involved in that conversation will naturally want to find ways to realise that dream so you’re likely to notice that at some point the conversation shifts to exploring different possibilities to achieve that.
I hope you enjoyed listening to this episode. Before we conclude it let me check in with you – how do you feel about dreaming now? What are you inspired to dream about? How could dreaming about that help you? I wonder, what might open up and become possible for you if you spent some time
